He's a new Maineworks employee. I knew I recognized him but I had never photographed him.

 
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Dear Anonymous,
He's a new Maineworks employee.
I knew I recognized him but I had never photographed him. He walks over to me before the MaineWorks Circle and reminds me. There it is. I remember. I know him from the streets. My worlds intersect.
He thanks me, and in doing so thanks Dear Anonymous.

'You kept me alive. I was going to kill myself. Had a plan. But you'd give me a coffee card. Say good morning. I'd sit and have coffee and change my plan. Most mornings that's what made the difference...
I knew I was gonna die if I didn't climb out. I called a friend; got connected to a sober house and got some help with the first month rent which I didn't have. Then they recommended employment at MaineWorks and here I am.'

And he is. He looks great. If not tender and aware that he got out by the skin of his teeth and that his path is tremulous and vulnerable. But he did it. Against all odds. I ask him over and over, 'How did you do it?' How did you find the energy and resources to leap off the street with heroin and alcohol snarling like mad dogs at your heels? It's so difficult.

Ever wonder if a coffee card can save a life? Wonder no more.
Thank you Dear Anonymous.

Just about everyone in this circle has hit a bottom. Some have hit it many times.

 
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Just about everyone in this circle has hit a bottom. Some have hit it many times. Everyone in this circle knows what it is to be the one who's messed up. Screwed up. Crashed. The one who lost most everything....including trust and respect. To see someone take the opportunity to build a life again putting the bricks back in a new position inspires. It inspires others who think or feel it can't be done. Who may feel it's too late. Or it's too much.
Never. And in this circle look around. Others suffer. Others are trying. Others will succeed. Others will fall and come back. Get to know them as yourself. Someone trying.

 

And this terrific employee?

 
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And this terrific employee? Shows up this morning at 0 degrees after stepping on a nail at the job site yesterday.
Went right through the bottom of her construction boot into her foot. She followed protocol to a T, got medical assistance and here she is this morning having never missed a beat.
Her comment: 'We need steel SOLED boots, not just steel TOED boots!'
A+ attitude.

 

MaineWorks Circle. Is it about recovery and struggles with the opioid crisis and alcoholism? Well, yes. But what's really at hand here?....

 
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MaineWorks Circle. Is it about recovery and struggles with the opioid crisis and alcoholism? Well, yes. But what's really at hand here?
The crisis of becoming human when you can no longer wash away the pain. When your rock bottom includes purposelessness or meaninglessness. What is it you are showing up to and what will make it be absolutely delicious to do so? 

 

MaineWorks provides employment opportunities and second and third and fourth chances.

 
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MaineWorks provides employment opportunities and second and third and fourth chances. What can support in early recovery look like? Employment in an environment where everyone is familiar with the complex and individual journey of recovery, for one.
Support can look like helping to get someone situated in a sober house that works for them; sometimes as simple as getting them some clothes to start out with. Boots to work in. Safety gear. And urgently, a respectful space in a circle of people trying their damnest to make a new life. Welcome.

 

Sometimes it's the conversations that spring up amongst MaineWorks employees....

 
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Sometimes it's the conversations that spring up amongst MaineWorks employees that really illustrate what is at hand. This morning several employees were reflecting on where they were in their lives two years ago. One year ago.
Self described as 'The Walking Dead.' Repeat that : The Walking Dead.
I sincerely barely recognize them from those times.
These men, standing by a fire at 6 AM conversing, are alive. Vibrant. Compassionate. Deliberately so.
With transformations like this, so much, so VERY much seems possible. Keep. Going.

 

This young man stopped by for a hug and some blueberry cake and a coffee card.

 
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Dear Anonymous,
This young man stopped by for a hug and some blueberry cake and a coffee card. Speaking clearly. Excited about his apartment. Working with a case worker, and he tells me, 'Staying away from the people I ought to stay away from.'
Noticeably clear headed this morning and it was lovely to see him.
Meanwhile,it's damn cold. Mike has been wandering around all night. Stomach upset. Huddles into granite window ledge outside the coffee shop.Takes a backpack filled with hats and toe warmers to share as he goes along.
No lengthy conversations today...grab a coffee card , some socks, and hand warmers (thank you Dear Anonymous) and go find a place inside.

 

The MaineWorks Circle was big this morning and was still looking for a few more employees to fill the requested jobs....

 
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The MaineWorks Circle was big this morning and was still looking for a few more employees to fill the requested jobs.
Employees were asked 'What have you done in your life that you think is cool?'
We heard: I've traveled the world; I've traveled to every state in the nation, one young man has done so riding train car. Others have stayed at Van Gogh's apartment in France; had clearance to ride on a stealth bomber. Some employees mentioned moose hunting and pig hunting; fishing long line; long boarding; athletic pursuits. But these are the answers that stopped me in my track:
My sobriety.
My daughter.
My two children.

 

This came up In Memories this morning. Dear Bruce Bannon...

 
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This came up In Memories this morning. Dear Bruce Bannon, featured in the photo is no longer with us having died this year. Until we meet again, Bruce.

Posted January 18, 2019 (one year ago):

At MaineWorks you will find a circle that is a repository of peoples' deepest pains, failings and brokenness. Even the fire pit is wobbly and missing a leg. I look at it with great affection because despite this it is working just fine and we huddle around it. ..as if to say 'Hey fire pit, you are rocking it today.'
It is also a circle where you will be seen more deeply. Beyond the transgressions, criminal offense, addiction, behavior born of addiction, pain and trauma. Someone will see that if you show up with your greatest pain the brokenness can also be a breaking open...and the light that begins to shine out of our brokenness will blind us with beauty. Yup. Just another morning at MaineWorks.

 

I remember this day.

 
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Dear Anonymous,
I remember this day. Late fall 2016 and I was new to MaineWorks and totally stunned by the people I was meeting there and with their journeys.This is where street sometimes crosses over with Maineworks.
He was a new employee. His life was up for grabs. He was cold. He was given a coat. He was warmer. And I remember his eyes and his smile. The following words are his:

" Precious, precious life. Yes, sometimes even life itself NEEDS a pair of socks. To many, a sock is just another insignificant, dispensable piece of fabric floating around underneath their bed or around their house.. But to a person living outside, a pair of socks can mean the world and so much more. Even a tiny taste of coveted safety or comfort. Warmth and dryness.... Just a taste.
So we dont forget what it feels like to be alright.
Find a dry place to change them.
Smile a bitter smile, and let your heart break again.
But it is the combined efforts of sock-givers, people-feeders and shelter providers that allow this life to persist. A chance to go to sleep that night, and say "maybe it will get better tomorrow"
Sometimes it does.
For me it did. I will never forget the kindness and i will never forget to pay it forward."
Amen, my Pioneer of Recovery. Amen and Lead the Way.

 

When he was asked, 'What do you do to keep the Beasts of Addiction at bay?'

 
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When he was asked, 'What do you do to keep the Beasts of Addiction at bay?' he answered, something like this:

'I do not hang myself with the rope.'

And I had trouble moving on to the next person's response and not just stopping there and absorbing the power of those words that kept rising in me like a tide. Rising almost to my nose and I were to drown if I did not listen again.